I'm a bit late reading my Church Times this week, but this article caught my eye - 'Where are the Clerical Bloggers?' Simon Sarmiento laments the fact that not many British clergy blog. However, he does say that it is more popular in Scotland, citing Dave McCarthy (www.gadgetvicar.typepad.com), Kelvin Holdsworth (see my fave blogs) and now Bishop David of St Andrews, Dunkeld and Dunblane (www.bishopdavid.net).

I've been reading Bishop David's blog since it began and it is certainly worth a look. He says, "Why blog? Well, it's today's way of putting myself in the marketplace. The SEC is a small church in a very secular society. As a bishop, I need to be across the boundary and engaging with wider society. Blogging - like broadcasting - which I also love - is the quickest way of doing that in an engaging way. I moved last year from Northern Ireland to Scotland: new place, new ministry and new people. One of our clergy said to me rather disarmingly: 'It's important to me to know what you are doing.' I'm making myself more accessible and hoping to encourage people."

Now, I wonder who made that comment about wanting to know what he was doing?!

Blogging is the way to communicate widely and the Church ought to be embracing this medium with outstretched arms. I know from comments on mine that a wide variety of people read them. How can we afford not to take up the challenge?

Ah, the stresses and strains of being in demand from the Press! It is just so tiring to have to deal with journalists phoning you up for a quote when you are trying to clean the windows of your new rectory. Yes, please spare a thought and a prayer, dear reader, for us poor overworked clergy who, even while on holiday, have to deal with a journalist from the last parish who has just found out you have gone and wants to write a piece on your leaving.

It was only two weeks ago but somehow it seems like a lifetime. But I gave Julie Currie of the Linlithgow Gazette a few wee quotes (and some 'off the records') for her article. She said someone was sending her a pic of me cutting the cake. Unfortunately. That will be the one of me with a glass in one hand and three chins. Oh well. At least I can guarantee the Paparazi will never catch me in a bikini - that I can promise!

Another thing they didn't teach us at Tisec...

Rehearsal yesterday for Tuesday evening's licensing. The Dean was on form and assured us that if anything went wrong, he was to blame. But if everything goes well, then it's all down to the Bishop.

I think I know where I've to be at any one time and provided none of us miss the step behind the altar it will be fine. But you know my reputation for steps near altars.

The other concern is whether we have enough seats for everyone. So, if you're reading this and thinking of coming then I would advise an early start to make sure you get a good seat. And those who are under 80 and agile will be upstairs in the balcony which has a great view.

The only question I forgot to ask was what I was to wear. Alb and stole? Chasuble or not? Do I put on the stole which is presented to me, or is it merely symbolic?

Not much time for blogging when you are playing nurse. Not much time for anything really. But mum has gone back to my sisters and is probably very relieved to be out of this mad house. However, we are nearly there. Only one room to be sorted and a bit of tweaking here and there and it will be fine.

The new sofas (thanks Sons and Friends of the Clergy!) arrived earlier than we expected this morning so it was a bit of a panic trying to get rid of the old furniture and rearranging things for them to fit. G put the covers on and they look fine. A little firmer than in the shop but I guess they will soften down a bit. Good for your posture though. And much better than having to heave the infirm out of the old one.

I've been back in Edinburgh for nearly 2 weeks and still haven't gone 'up town' shopping. May be tomorrow.

Mum arrived today to stay for a few days to give my sister a rest. She arrived with a car load of stuff, including a chemist-shop's worth of pills, a list of instructions, and the commode.

This afternoon we visited the Oncologist and it seems that her Pancreas is not funtioning properly so she has been given enzymes to take which may help her absorb food better. She has been sick quite a lot lately and I won't go into the story of her bowels. Suffice to say that giving her antibiotics which cause diarrhoea might not have been such a good idea, especially in a rectory with a dodgy loo!

Mum can't walk very far now so we had to get a wheel chair at the Royal Infirmary. You have to pay £1 for these but you get it back when you return it - like a supermarket trolley. The one I found had obviously just been returned by someone who had been out in the pouring rain and it was soaked. We only had one wee hankie between us so it was a damp ride. But my steering has improved since last time and we didn't hit anyone or anything.

We have set up a bed in the lounge for mum because she can't get upstairs (and there's no loo up there). When we got back from the hospital her dog which I am now looking after, had been up on her bed and pee-ed on it. That's twice in a few days. He is 12 so there is no excuse, except that he must be upset by all the change in routine. Why didn't he use the commode that was right next to the bed, I ask myself? Or his own bed? Yeh, that'll be right.

Went to register with the doctor today and had a wee examination (BP 120/64, weight - mind your own business, height - 5'4" or something else in metric, urine - fine and sugar-free which was a surprise). Also had to give my medical history which took a wee bit of explaining but we managed to get through it all without forgetting anything major. One wee question made me laugh though.

Doctor: Do you smoke?
Me: Yes.
Doctor: Oh dear, how many a day?
Me: 20, but they are very, very mild.
Doctor: Well you should give up but I suppose now is not the time.
Me: Quite.
Doctor: Do you take any recreational drugs? Ooops! Silly question for someone in your job.
Me: Really?

Doctor moved on quickly to the next question. But it left me wondering. Why on earth would someone think that clergy don't need recreational drugs? She certainly didn't gloss over the 'how many units of alcohol did I consume' question.

I guess that we can chill out with meditation and prayer, or get high with incense and the Holy Spirit (and good liturgy, I would add). And if we wanted to stay awake for hours on end babbling like an idiot we only have to survive Christmas or Holy Week. So who needs drugs indeed?

I have just discovered that my new church-to-be has a website at http://www.saintmarks-edinburgh.org.uk/

It is needing a little updating and will no doubt be revamped in time but you can at least see a picture of the gorgeous building exterior which is covered in scaffolding at the moment. But better that than pails to catch drips when it rains.

As I am church-less at the moment, I went home to St Michael & All Saints yesterday for a fix. There is nothing quite like a little Palestrina, the smell of incense and a warm welcome to get you in touch with God.

There was also a baptism so Fr Kevin preached one of his wonderful sermons-with-props. This time it involved blowing up a balloon, and I'm sure it will be used by me in future.

The dog pee-ed on the carpet. This does not bode well.

The move is over and I am now settled in my new rectory amidst boxes and bags and general mayhem. However, it all went relatively smoothly and I can thoroughly recommend 'Bishop's Move' for all your removal needs. I never heard one complaint about the amount of books and that's saying something. The labelling of boxes could have been a little more specific though. 'Study Odds' doesn't really do justice to my precious things.

Had a visit from Patsy yesterday who fired through boxes like a fiend and even got the hall cleared and looking gorgeous. I even got 3 flower arrangements yesterday so at least the boxes look pretty with them on top.

The whole Broadband/TV/Phone thing was a little more traumatic and I haven't had the courage to disconnect from my old server but that is on the agenda for today. And we didn't get the phone number we had been promised so thank goodness I didn't get the stationary printed. But nobody died so I guess, in the grand scheme of things, this is small fry.

Had a party to go to last night to meet the Vestry and other 'important people' and I couldn't find my party clothes so wore an eclectic mix of clothes that could be found. Lovely to chat informally with those who interviewed me just a few months ago.

And now it's on with the unpacking and searching. I may be gone for some time... again.

After two emotional services yesterday morning, and a lovely lunch, I finally took my leave of St P's and St C's for good. I don't think it has really sunk in that I won't be there next Sunday having fun with my little flocks. All the servers at St C's were out in force beside me in the Sanctuary and Jim had even organised for us to have bells and a procession with the cross at the gospel (frowned upon by some as being 'too high' but he wanted it for my last day!). And we all 'flew' out in procession to God is our strength and refuge to the tune of the Dambusters March. (My favourite tune!)

And now today the removal men arriveth in a few minutes. My computer won't be reconnected until Wednesday and even then I have little faith that I will be up and running by then. So, in the words of somebody famous, I may be gone for some time...

Wonderful leaving do at St Peter's last night. We gathered together in a packed church with all my friends and ecclesiastical neighbours. Lovely, flattering and I'm sure undeserved, words were spoken and gifts were given: a beautiful print of Linlithgow Cross, a memory book of my time here (the best!), a generous cheque and other wee gifts. There was a fabulous cake with purple icing and a very funny story to go with it.

Such a wrench to say goodbye to so many wonderful people.

"We shall do a half-day pre-pack of all your glass and china on Friday," they said.

8.30am and one man arrived to do just that. Then he was followed by two young men who wanted to pack up my bedroom... "just leave what clothes you want on your bed." I had to grab my make-up and underwear before it was packed away. I almost had to wrestle my hairdrier out of his sweaty paws. Lord knows what else has gone, never to be found again this side of Tuesday.

I have just had to eat lunch off a purple picnic plate with plastic knife and fork. And the half-day pack has grown to 4pm. It's going to be a minimal weekend.

"Good evening, your reverence," says the frog.

The vicar can hardly believe his ears. "I didnt know frogs could talk," he says.

"I'm not a frog really," says the frog. "I'm a handsome young prince whom a wicked witch has turned into a frog until I sleep one night beside a holy man."

"I'll be as holy as I can," says the vicar humbly and at home he places the frog on the table beside him as he goes to sleep.

Sure enough, when he wakes up the next morning the frog has gone and a handsome young prince lies in its place.

"AND THERE, M'LUD," boomed the Counsel for the defence, "THE DEFENCE RESTS ITS CASE!"

(From Rabbi Lionel Blue's Jokes)

"Good evening, your reverence," says the frog.

The vicar can hardly believe his ears. "I didnt know frogs could talk," he says.

"I'm not a frog really," says the frog. "I'm a handsome young prince whom a wicked witch has turned into a frog until I sleep one night beside a holy man."

"I'll be as holy as I can," says the vicar humbly and at home he places the frog on the table beside him as he goes to sleep.

Sure enough, when he wakes up the next morning the frog has gone and a handsome young prince lies in its place.

(From Rabbi Lionel Blue's Jokes)

"AND THERE, M'LUD," boomed the Counsel for the defence, "THE DEFENCE RESTS ITS CASE!"

"Good evening, your reverence," says the frog.

The vicar can hardly believe his ears. "I didnt know frogs could talk," he says.

"I'm not a frog really," says the frog. "I'm a handsome young prince whom a wicked witch has turned into a frog until I sleep one night beside a holy man."

"I'll be as holy as I can," says the vicar humbly and at home he places the frog on the table beside him as he goes to sleep.

Sure enough, when he wakes up the next morning the frog has gone and a handsome young prince lies in its place.

"AND THERE, M'LUD," boomed the Counsel for the defence, "THE DEFENCE RESTS ITS CASE!"

I can't believe I am half way through my last week here. It has just flown by and I have not even had time to blog or check all the other blogs which I read. My 'To Do' list is growing by the minute, but the minutes are decreasing rapidly and I just know I am not going to get everything done. Getting round town is becoming more and more difficult too as people stop me for a farewell chat. I can't just pop in to the Post Office now to redirect my mail without conversations with the woman behind the counter and a man who once heard me speak at the local Rotary last year.

However, it has been a week for good news too. My friend Kelvin (see the link to his blog at the side of this one) has been appointed the new Provost of St Mark's Cathedral in Glasgow. This is great news and I'm sure the cathedral will grow spiritually and in all sorts of exciting ways in his tender care.

Last night I had my leaving do with St C's at the Fairway Hotel. There was a good turnout - better than many Sundays! WE had a lovely meal and nobody had to do the washing up which was nice.

Jim said some kind words, and then we were visited by an old priest by the name of Rev'd Lightbody (aka Duncan in a droopy moustache and alarming Elvis wig). He made a hilarious speech interspersed with snippets from songs and I haven't laughed so much in ages. I had had a few glasses of vino so can't quite remember all the songs featured but I do know that 'Purple Rain', 'I want to break free', and 'Fat bottomed girls' featured. The last referred to our Egyptian dancing evenings and not my own physique - but it could easily have done!

My little flock have also bought me a wonderful coffee table with drawers to hide all sorts of rubbish. So whenever I look at it I shall remember St C's. John and Pat also gave me a beautiful cross which splits in two, and I shall wear it with pride.

Found a new website today:
http://www.cassock-u-like.org.uk

You can sell your old cassock to some poor theological student, or buy a nice warm cloak (hardly worn) for those wintery graveside encounters. You can also buy and sell theological books. Ebay eat your heart out.

Now I wonder if anyone is looking to get rid of a some rose vestments, or a Juliet Hemingray stole...

Good article today in the Herald.
http://www.theherald.co.uk/features/55442.html

Broke a tooth last week eating some popcorn. It was an old tooth. In fact it was mostly filling. No pain, just jagginess and a not very nice taste. So I made an appointment for the dentist before I move house and it all gets chaotic and I am unable to find an NHS dentist in Edinburgh.

Arrived at the dentist at 9.55am this morning. Read a bit of Heat magazine. Well, I say 'read' but in actual fact it was mostly pictures of 'celebrities' with no make up on. Poor souls. Was seen by the dentist at about 10.05am and he put a temporary filling on my tooth, saying, "This is just temporary so be careful." I have to go back next Thursday.

The temporary filling tasted vile - even more vile than the gappy tooth - and spread its goo-iness all over my tongue and chops. It felt a bit squidgy so I tried to keep my tongue away from it, assuming it would harden.

Did some photocopying, a little shopping and returned home for lunch. Thought I'd have soup just in case I dislodged the temporary filling before it had really set. Three spoonfuls later and it had gone. I know not where but can only assume it melted and I have swallowed it. It wasn't even lumpy soup - no chewing was involved.

I had assumed, perhaps naively, that temporary meant that it would last more than a few hours. So, how temporary is temporary?

In exactly two weeks time I shall be in my new, hint-of-lilac rectory surrounded by boxes. That will be the exciting time, finding new places for my objets and moving furniture into the nooks and crannies. I have already found the perfect place for my glow-in-the-dark Virgin Mary and Action Figure Jesus.

But before then there is the nightmare that is packing and discarding. Not to mention the emotional leaving do's and saying goodbye to my little flock. Oh how I will miss them!

We saw the Oncologist yesterday and were told that the primary site of mum's cancer is probably the pancreas, and that she only has about 4 months. Reassured to find that the fatigue and loss of appetite are all part of the disease. Chemotherapy would be an option but would only prolong things by a month and a major side-effect would be tiredness so it doesn't seem worth while. Now we aim for quality not quantity.

Mum had a moment or two of upset but is now quite calm and taking it all very well.